Great Teacher Onizuka - Great - Onizuka + Me + Elementary School = WWIII

So being a nocturnal creature recently, I went to bed this morning at 6 a.m. which turned out to be a very stupid idea. I got a call at 7 a.m. from the nearby (English) elementary school and they asked for me to arrive at 8:30 a.m. It's a good thing it is close by, otherwise I think I'd be dead by now.

It was a replacement for a team teacher (who works on alternate days) whose son was very sick so she had to go home today. The instructions were quite lengthy but comprehensible. I don't think the problem today was the lesson plans.

The kids were grade levels 3 and 4. One of the things I immediately noted was that kids in elementary school are so small and fragile, yet can act so brashly and disastrously. I had to "break up" at least 7 fights during the day, between the same handful of kids. Was it becasue they didn't think they were observed by a teacher? Were they just ignorant of their actions? Or did they think that I didn't know any better?

After getting 3 different people to intervene in the class during the day, the kids still didn't understand that they were driving me STARK RAVING MAD. I tried to start the kids at the "do it for your teacher and her sick kid" level of cooperation, but it quickly escaladed to "OMFGWTF STOP TOUCHING THAT GIRL THERE YOU DISGUSTING LITTLE BOY!!!"

The staff didn't blame me for the disastrous day. I was informed that this class was indeed a "bit tough" and "had problems with a previous substitute," but they didn't learn their lesson so they're going to be forced to each write me a letter of apology tomorrow. That'll teach them. Yeah.

By the way, I can't believe how much BS comes out of kids. Don't ever trust a kid to tell you the truth in a classroom situation.