A Dream Come True! ... NO!!!

I'm certain I'm not the only one who has these dreams ('cuz I know that Jorghnassen has them). They consist of various items being flushed down the toilet for no apparent reason. Examples: my glasses, a pencil case, living goldfish, entire closets of clothes. Actually, one of my most persistent dreams consists of caring for fish, but that's another story.

In today's episode, I washed the apartment floors. I used a bucket full of hot water and yellow cleaning fluid (lemon scented Lysol), which is supposed to do a good job on the mold growing on washroom items. As I wiped down the shower tiles, I spotted the disused drain plug, laying in the corner and covered with icky black film on the underside. Thus, I dropped it in the bucket, hoping to get to it after I finished the tiles. After ten minutes, I emptied the entire dirty bucket into the toilet, and it self-flushed.

Guess what I forgot?

Rasterbate Yeah

The other silly image project. :)

This is what the internet called "Rasterbation." It is a process where you take an image and blow it up onto many sheets of paper (or simply the blowing up part), stick it together, and hang it up somewhere and have other internet geeks gawk at it. The finished image can consist of the halftone or coloured dots style (like newspaper prints), pixellation, lines, or any other kind of printing process. The idea is that you print it big. And take a picture of it. And show the world.

Join me in World Domination!

... Or just for nation leader luncheon...
Greater Caqban, the place to be
Where you can do hardly but take a wee;
Sigh not relief, for if you knew
The government will watch you too.

Vectorize It!

Thank you, vectorizing tutorial! This is my first foray into the art. Needless to say it didn't come out too well, but Jorgh let me post it anyway. :)



So the main advantage to using paths in Photoshop is the possibility of scaling the image without loss of quality. I attempted to show Jorghnassen this by hastily pasting the image on a random background... but when I rotated the image, it looks rather eerie.



The main disadvantage is that it takes a really, really long time to do one in the first place, especially if you're just starting. I gave up doing the rest of the background in the first photo and cheated. Can you tell?

Sketch

I doodled this afternoon at the learning center, but I didn't finish shading the last three panels. You can make inferences on the story but I don't think I have an explanation.

P.S. I know the dog doesn't look like a dog.

Not something to write home about, people!

But I will anyway. I worked (supply teaching) recently at the Adult Ed for a few days. It's a very nice place with reasonable resources. The staff is exceptionally nice, and the principal will bend over backwards into pretzels for absolutely everyone. I have never seen anyone so accommodating for its own sake.

The part that I wanted to mention was that I finally got to drive myself to work for the first time last Friday. And my mum lent me the car today to drive myself to work again. :D And to top it off, I also drove up the gajillion bus hours to the base to work this afternoon. ***AND*** as I had picked up my mum from work this evening, she said finally, "Oh, it seems you can drive now."

Oh, throw a dog a bone...

---

I think I haven't shut up enough about the hot water tank. It has finally been changed thanks to the senior landlord (a.k.a. the guy's father) and the brown gucky stuff is out of the system. Now all it has to do is heat up the damn water. WHERE IS THE HOT WATER????? 

The Landlord is a #$&%head!

Actually, it's been 5 days since we discovered our hot water tank no longer makes hot water, since it would rather excrete its stinky brown contents slowly into the small tray-like basin it's sitting on.

My mum and I called the guy's cell a dozen times and he has yet to show any sign of life. My mum even mentioned that she got past the message "completely full voice box" to leaving a message in the last day or so, but that means he probably just deleted all the voice messages. GODDAMN #@$%.

Ok, gotta go boil more water now for the dishes.

LOST

Sorry, the unfunny joke is spoilerific.... ;) 

Another LOST post.

OMG Charlie, you cad!

Mr Eko is totally badass.

Finally, it looks like Kate has yet another role on the island, besides ranger-fighter-nurse: coiffeuse. I think the scraggly look on Sawyer was growing too scraggly for the fanbase, but whatever. Chicks dig scraggly nowadays. (But that doesn't mean that Jorgh is allowed to let himself grow into that.)

Gar-funkitize

Oh, Garfield, you and your crazy coffee antics! 

Puffy

I finally got home last night and it looks like things wait for me to arrive to happen. My mum's facial swelling got much worse overnight, so she first attempted to wake me up this morning to drive her to the hospital. Being the odd creature of the wee hours (don't ask), I couldn't wake up. Anyway, as she was busy tottering about and washing her hair... she realized that the hot water tank was busted. Not only does it not heat anymore, it leaked into the thankfully present tray under it. And the landlord... well, we couldn't get a hold of that dude.

So she flitters about even moreso, and starts to frustratingly utter random scoldings like the utter uselessness of my sleeping habits.

Well, I feel bad now because she drove herself to the hospital while I have to wait for the annoying dude to come by, if at all.

Happy New Year!

I started the new year with a really odd dream. When I woke up, it left me with a bit of unsatisfactory-story-ending syndrome, not because it was a particularly good dream but because it made absolutely no sense to me, namely why I would make such terribly slapstick crap.

I don't really like these meta-stories, but I dreamt that I was writing a screenplay for fun. It was about a young woman (my dream casted Sandra Bullock) who was a struggling writer who had problems getting someone to publish her novel. Approaching a publisher, he admitted to her that she was too "boring."

He held up a recent bestselling publication by an older, flamboyantly(?) gay writer, whose picture happened to be on the cover for some odd reason. "This guy, on the other hand, is interesting." (Initially casted Tom Hanks, of all people :| ... but then I think my brain readjusted this logic and casted Ian McKellan!)

So the young woman went out of her way to track him down. Or maybe she accidentally runs into him. Whatever. It's a screenplay about Ian McKellan the writer and Sandra Bullock the writer. I don't remember writing any more than that scenario.

My dream-writer-self then runs into the dream-actual Ian McKellan, and for some godforsaken reason, who had already read the abstract of the screenplay. He proclaimed it great and he wanted me to write the rest of the screenplay so that he would actually do this terrible movie.

Finding it incredibly hard to believe, I started writing total slapstick garbage into notes. I came up with about 6 ideas but I forgot them all except 2.

One where the two main characters are on the old man's yacht with about four other guys. They just survived a harrowing ocean experience.
old man proclaims: Well done, my seamen. (LOLPWNED!!11!1one!!)
young woman: What about me?
old man: Woman, scrub the deck. (or something equally as misogynistic­­­)

The other idea is a young bi man sleeps with both of them at different times in the story.

Anyway, I think I was about to present the story to Gandalf himself when I woke up. I remember feeling incredibly bad for writing complete shit, but if anyone else out there thinks I should actually end this story in a satisfactory way (which I did, with Jorgh when I woke up), please give a shout-out. Otherwise I will have to admit to myself that my brain makes up the stupidest crap and I should never trust it.