Buffeteer by Night... Superhero by Day!
Julie suggested it would be a good cover job, bufeteering I mean, for a superhero. Unfortunately, it's mostly night work for me, since I finish at around midnight after cleaning the damn tables.
So here's a list of potentially fatal injuries (to your job) if you are a buffeteer.
Scrapes
- Downfall: Sure they're innocent bleeding scratches, but if your arms are secreting the red stuff, it's no longer so tasty for the clients to eat anymore. This is probably just hazardous to the clients though. UNTIL IT GETS INFECTED!!! (Which it did, yes.)
- Counter: Bandage. Baby stuff, really. Unless there are no plastic adhesive bandages lying around, which can happen even in a restaurant.
- Prevention: Suck it up.
Blisters
- Downfall: Your little bobo on your pinky toe can actually make your work a living hell. Just by walking back and forth may bring about a GIGANTIC PUS BUBBLE OF PAIN-BRINGING AGONY!!! (Which it did, yet again.)
- Counter: Bandage.
- Prevention: Thick socks. Good shoes. No running to work because of a stupid late bus.
Burns
- Downfall: Steam is a nasty, unsuspicious HELLBRINGER OF PAIN!!! You don't think of it as a burn hazard until you have to work with it every day at the tables. Even some hot metal surfaces don't burn as much as steam, since the only direct thing that is being heated up is the water in the tables. As you can probably guess, two of my fingers got burned today from escaping steam. Thereby, one of the burns evoled into a blister, and the other evolved into a swollen mess.
- Counter: Bandage. Buffet ice cubes. Chinese ointment would have been useful if they had any at the time.
- Prevention: Avoid touching anything ever again.
Bruised and Bloody Fists
- Downfall: You keep telling yourself it isn't a good idea. No matter how many times the bitchy coworker oversteps herself, or how much the untouchable coworker slacks off, you knew in your good sense it was never a good idea. But you had to do it anyway. And now both your fists are sore from the X-TREME!!! POUNDING!!! you submitted to the unfortunate coworkers. Now you're screwed.
- Counter: Bandages. Lots of them.
- Prevention: Meditation classes.
3 comments:
You should get hazard pay!
PJ
Steam burns: didn't they say in elementary school science class, steam always burns worse than water since it's already hot enough to be gaseous? Whereas boiling water always maxes out at 100.
I agree: hazard pay all 'round!
gg
Ah. Elementary school. Perhaps if it wasn't full of painfully tormenting memories of a childhood gone terribly, horribly wrong I may have recalled this particular fact.
But of course I stopped remembering things from about six weeks ago as well. So, no. I don't remember anything to do with steam and such. But thanks for reminding me. :)
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